Where is Emily Post When I Freakin’ Need Her?


July 15, 2011 by Sarah Christine Bolton

I have to admit I’m guilty of committing about a dozen faux pas a week. I’m a California girl living in the south and I refuse to say y’all (I say “you guys” instead). So, you can see how I might struggle with the finer points of Southern etiquette.

But sometimes, I do feel way too self-conscious about my social decisions, and I start to wonder: is there a better/less awkward way to go about doing something?

The one scenario that comes to mind is when someone gives you a gift, outside of a birthday party or Christmas.
Picture this. You are meeting a friend for a drink. She shows up with a super fru-fru gift bag, all coordinated and ribboned, etc. She hands it to you, beaming.

What do you do?

Do you open it there? Right then?
Do you wait until you get home?

But then all sorts of other questions arise.

If you open it there, and you hate it, can you fake  your delight well enough to not hurt your friends feelings?

Or do you just tell them it sucks? (Note: the answer to this question must take into consideration how many drinks you have each had already).

What if they didn’t include a gift receipt, and you want one?

What if there is a card with a cheezy message that you have to read while slightly intoxicated? If you start getting teary-eyed, will you have remembered to wear waterproof mascara?

If you wait, how long is too long? Do you open it in your car and text them photos of yourself holding the gift while driving? (Note: Driving while texting is illegal in some states. Avoid cops.)

Or do you wait until you get home? Then, do you have to call them to thank them? Is a text enough? Or would taking a photo of yourself with the gift and using it as your profile pic on Facebook be thanks enough?

Just writing this is making my blood pressure rise. I’m very curious to know if I’m the only tard on the planet who asks these questions. And, I’m also curious to hear from my more socially-appropriate friends, who probably know the exact way to properly accept a gift.

Comment and set me straight, you guys! (Sorry… still never going to say ya’ll, even if it is the proper thing to do).

(BTW, Emily Post has a website. Who knew? Turns out you don’t even have to be alive to manage your online presence!)

2 thoughts on “Where is Emily Post When I Freakin’ Need Her?

  1. you’re funny! i would have opened it right then and there and thanked her profusely. end of story. 🙂 that’s just me though. . .i am southern, btw though so i’m just saying what i would do and expect others to do. 🙂

  2. cbgrace says:

    Okay, I am southern…open the gift, no matter what it is, gush over it. Send a “Thank You” note. It is the thought that counts and she was thinking of you. BTW, what did she give you? (Don’t text and drive…ever…sorry, unsolicited advise).

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